WITHOUT ANOTHER WORD SPOKEN, EVERYONE IN THE STORE RUSHES TOWARD ME WITH MURDER IN THEIR EYES. IN A PANIC, I RUN INTO THE LINGERIE SECTION AND FIND MYSELF DASHING BLINDLY THROUGH RACKS AND ROWS OF WOMEN'S INTIMATES, BECOMING TANGLED UP IN BLACK LACE BRASSIERES AND RED SILK NEGLIGEES, THEN STUMBLING INTO A DISPLAY OF DOUBLE D SUPPORT BRAS AND WHITE COTTON PANTIES. I MANAGE TO UNTANGLE MYSELF JUST AS TWO BEEFY WOMEN LIKE WNFL LINEBACKERS DIVE AT ME, AND I JUMP OVER THEM AND RUN LIKE A HERO QUARTERBACK IN THE PLAY OF THE CENTURY. BUT TO MY HORROR...